Mom

A little about my mom on this wet, dreary Mothers Day.

My mom was born in 1913 in the coal town of Mahanoy City, PA.  She was the second of six children and the first daughter.  Her family was relatively poor growing up, her dad was a coal miner. Ha! She was a coalminer’s daughter! She left school in 9th grade to go to work in a cigar factory. Sometime after that, the family moved to Slatington when her dad found a job in the slate quarries.

It was in Slatington where my mom and dad met. He was attracted by her beauty and her leather jacket. He noticed her around town and actually went to ask her parents if he could date their daughter that wears a leather jacket. How cool is that! I heard, much later, that she was most attracted to my dad because he had his own car. So because of cars and leather jackets….I am here!

I don’t know much about my mom’s early married years. As I wrote about before, I came way behind my four siblings. I was basically an only child from age 6 on, so I can only reference that time.

I know that she had a tumultuous relationship with my dad. There were often arguments followed by long periods of silence. There were threats of divorce, occasionally, but everyone knew that could not and would not happen.  There were some happy times in the marriage too, I think.  One thing I got from my mom is that tendency to go silent when angry, but luckily I rarely get angry,

My own relationship with my mom was somewhat conflicted.  I always felt that I was not good enough for her or not the right kind of son. Positive feedback was nearly non-existent. She tended to use shame as a discipline tactic.   But on the flip side, she was probably my biggest supporter in that she wanted me to go to college and have a successful life.

Just a couple quick memories of my mom. I wrestled in high school and I remember her screaming and yelling whenever I was in a match.  I remember how she called her youngest sister, Lorna, every single morning and talked for at least an hour. I remember coming home from school, the day Kennedy was assassinated, and finding her crying in front of the TV.  It was the only time I remember seeing  my mom cry.

I lost my mom on Christmas Day in 1967. She suffered with heart problems much of her life and they finally caught up with her. She had been in a coma for about a week.  I take some solace in that  the last thing I said to her was “bye Mom” as I headed out to a wrestling meet. That was the last time I saw her conscious.

So, whether your mom is still alive or has gone on to another life, cherish your relationship with her. It is a bond like no other on Earth.

Happy Mothers Day!